So, you know a carpenter’s square, right? It’s that high-precision tool used for marking out components super accurately. Well, a recent survey showed that 38% of British men have used it as a hammer. Yeah, seriously! Imagine using something that helped build the Parthenon to bang in picture hooks. The ancient Greeks would be rolling in their graves.
Welcome to ManLab, where we tackle the mediocrity plaguing us chaps. Here, we sharpen our skills and punish incompetence. For example, we’ve fought duels, outwitted Nazis, and run a railway network. Tonight, we’ll show you how to survive a first date using technology, wallpaper like a celebrity, revive the forgotten craft of movie-making, and battle mankind’s oldest foe: the wasp.
Let’s start with something dramatic. Ever had a petty dispute over something silly, like the height of a hedge? We’re bringing back dueling to settle scores. Meet Max and Sean from Nottinghamshire, who’ve been simmering over a playground fight for 25 years. Time to settle this with a saber duel, like gentlemen.
They gear up with sabers and fake blood bags. Strict rules, saber points a foot apart, and at my shout, they go for it. One slash, a red streak, and honor is satisfied. Yet, it’s more than just a fight; it’s a brilliant throwback to simpler times when disputes ended with a handshake—after a sword slash, of course.
After pretending to be an 18th-century noble for a bit, we shift gears to celebrate our mate Tom’s 45th with a spectacular homemade rocket. We planned an epic launch, complete with musical firework displays. Sadly, the rocket soared briefly, misfired, and hilariously bit the dust—much like many midlife crises. Still, reaching for the stars is always worth it, even if you crash and burn.
ManLab isn’t just about explosions—we also delve into lost DIY arts. We built our very own cinema in a packed house, then decided to make a classic film with an old Clockwork camera. It’s laborious, editing film by hand, splicing together shots while staying true to the artisanal roots of early cinema. The result? “The Plumber Comes”—a poignant reminder of what to do when your shower breaks down, complete with charmingly stiff performances. The crowd loved it, and suddenly, we were not just DIY enthusiasts, but budding filmmakers.
Speaking of classic fights, flies are a nuisance. In ManLab fashion, we unleashed a radio-controlled helicopter armed with flypaper to hunt them. Sure, it’s over-the-top, but oh-so-satisfying to see a tiny fly get caught in airborne flypaper.
Graduating from flies, our tech-fueled battle against wasps involved a T-Rex 600 Nitro Pro Helicopter armed with homemade air-to-wasp missiles. Yes, it’s extreme, but sometimes you need the heavy artillery to reclaim your sandwiches from these pesky invaders.
Next up—romance. We outfitted Charlie with an earpiece for his date, feeding him lines to keep the conversation smooth. From discussing wine to subtly hinting at a second date, we thought we had it all figured out until, surprise, she had a boyfriend! Awkward, sure, but it reminded us that sometimes, the best laid plans still go awry.
Finally, we formed a grade one orchestra from lapsed musicians for a debut at St. Martin in the Fields. The performance, though wobbly, struck a chord. The final act was our trumpeter—Donald—hitting the last few notes of “Three Blind Mice,” completing a bizarre but touching musical journey.
Manlab is all about tackling life’s mundane or bizarre problems with a can-do spirit and a dose of British eccentricity. Whether dueling old school, fumbling through film-making or battling wasps with homemade missiles – it’s always good craic. Thanks for joining this mad adventure. Until next time, keep your tools ready and your spirits high!
